Is it too early to say I less than 3 you?

What the hell is wrong with me? How in the world can I suddenly, unabashedly fall head over heels for someone in less than two weeks? Someone I've seen twice, for God's sake. This is the weirdest courtship I've ever been involved in. We talk every day, sometimes for hours on end, and yet we've seen each other two times. And the first time we acted more like a couple than the second. So what the hell? She lives 10 freaking blocks away, and yet, this is like a strange long-distance relationship. I've had those before. They suck.

But let's return to the original question. What the hell is wrong with me? This time is probably a record for me. That's saying a lot given the fact that I told a girl I loved her 3 days after we started dating. Granted I was 15, but even then puppy love is a different universe than "falling" is for a 28 year old. And yet I still feel 15. She changed her ringback tone to a song by my favorite band. She's not a huge fan of the band, so of course, stupid me decides to read into it far more than I should be. I am 15.

So now I'm at that epic cliffhanger moment right before I tell her how I feel. And at this stage, we are at a minimum of a few months away from when that is appropriate. No, I'm not going to tell her I love her. At least not in so many words, as the affect that had on my 15 year old companion was... well it sucked. So now I'm in the twilight zone. The part where I manage to mangle a good thing by introducing something WAY too early. Fortunately, I have a great deal of experience in doing just that so I will handle the fallout gracefully. I always do.

The question, however, is why do I do it in the first place? I am always convincing myself "this girl is different", with every girl. And in this case, it's especially ironic, because she is different in the sense that she's a LOT like me. A lot, a lot. We are finish each others sentences alike. Cute-romantic-comedy type alike (for the record, I'd require Seth Rogan to play me). Which begets the ultimate question, why doesn't SHE feel the same way? You might be thinking, "Well Mr. Virgo, you are still unique individuals... and blah blah blah". Yeah I know. But to see this in perspective one must look at the big picture.

In the last two weeks, between talking and texting we've actually surpassed the amount of communication I had during my entire 4 year marriage. I didn't say it was a good marriage, but still, in two weeks? She calls me every day, usually a couple of times. We text every day from the time we wake up until we go to bed. And to cap it all off she's 20 for heaven's sake... 20 year olds are often finding themselves "in love" within a matter of moments.

So what is going on here? Do I jump in the ocean and hope that with all of our commonalities, she feels the same way I do and hasn't said anything? Well no. She's been very careful to use "I don't know" frequently when talking about us. So why the hell is she calling me every day? Do I wait things out and hope in doing so she'll drop the 92389 foot wall she has around her heart? Well, that sucks. So while I'm totally falling in love with her, I'm supposed to "wait" to let her know until an opportune time arises. And what, pray tell, happens if that time never comes up? Then I get hurt for keeping my mouth shut. Awesome.

So, the only reasonable conclusion is holding off as long as I can, and have a statement prepared for when I can't hold back any longer. The biggest problem with this method is my history of bad timing. Not much you can say about it, except that it's incredibly consistent. When is a good time to talk about "exclusive"... that's pretty subjective. But with the bassackwards way this relationship is going, I'm even more lost than usual. And the kicker is, she's supposed to be the confused 20 year old. Go figure.